Miscarriage in the Past

To have lost your baby a long time ago does not take away the memories, pain and hurt you remember.

Babies lost in the past were sadly supposed to be forgotten in the false hope that to erase these babies from people’s memories would take away the pain from the parents also. How wrong this was – for when a woman loses her baby time may heal the pain but will never erase the memories. Memories are precious and should always be treasured.

See ‘Ideas to Remember your Baby’

You may have carried a lot of guilt, sadness, anger and frustration at having miscarried your baby and then having to try to get on with your life as if nothing had happened.

 

“After a miscarriage it’s easy for others to tell you to move forward; to go on. Because to them it was just a lost ‘pregnancy’ but that was my baby to me”

Being told that maybe it was a blessing or God’s will was not very helpful and if anything added to the anger and pain of losing your baby.

You would not have had mementoes such as scan pictures or, if your baby was lost later in the pregnancy, photos of your baby. Maybe, if you had ever been able to talk openly about your baby, the grief could have been acknowledged and eased.

It is never too late to do this. Most people nowadays would not find it strange to hear how hard it must have been for you to get on with life after your miscarriage and how, most women, if only to close friends, would count these babies in when discussing how many children they have.

The Miscarriage Association is there to listen to anyone who has lost their baby. Don’t be afraid to get in touch no matter how long you have been bereaved.

Sometimes talking to others who have suffered miscarriage can be of great help.